Financially ruined, physically drained, and psychologically dulled, Jose Canseco lived the pumped up life too long. The New York Daily News carries a piece on A&E's one hour special featuring a broken and discouraged Canseco. Among other sins, Canseco expresses his regret about steroid use, and about writing his best selling tell-all-steroids-in-baseball book "Juiced".
In an interesting detour Canseco visits a California physician who treats his testosterone deficiency. However, according to this piece, the treatment isn't working. This may explain why Canseco, desperate for treatment, tried to smuggle in HCG from Mexico to the USA; HCG can supply testosterone support to steroid users.
Jose Canseco, admitted steroid user and Major League Baseball's black sheep, says that he is sorry he penned his 2005 steroid tell-all "Juiced" and that he is scared for his health after 23 years of hard-core performance-enhancing drug use, a steroid addiction he claims he kicked only this year...
What viewers will see is a much more vulnerable Canseco than the man who wrote "I hate your (expletive) guts" in "Vindicated" when addressing A-Rod, or the confident Canseco at the boxing weigh-in when he described his "incredible knockout power."
"The biggest mistake I made was, I should have not written ("Juiced")," Canseco says in the A&E special. "The more I think about it, the more I regret mentioning these players in my book."
Canseco reiterates his claim that baseball forced him out of the game, angering him to the point that he "wanted revenge." The book "Juiced" was his haymaker, he said, and he named names "to show I was telling the truth" about the steroid culture.
Now Canseco, perhaps broke, expresses contrition about exposing MLB teammates such as Mark McGwure:
But while the hearing led to a stricter drug-testing program, Canseco now says he wants to apologize for those he outed.
"If I could meet with Mark McGwire and these players, I definitely would apologize to them," says Canseco. "They were my friends. I admired them. I respected them."
The special follows Canseco through the medical visits for low testosterone. It is interesting how the older anabolic steroid users who once pumped themselves up artificially, now suffer from androgen deflation...like the economy these days.
The show also follows Canseco through a series of medical appointments with Santa Monica physician Dr. Brent Michael. Canseco tells Michael he wants to wean himself off steroids for good and restore his testosterone levels, since quitting cold turkey isn't working.
"I have no sex drive whatsoever. Zero," says Canseco, who is filmed in one sequence meeting Michael with current girlfriend Heidi Northcott present. Canseco admits to bouts of depression and wanting to be left alone.
Michael prescribes a gel supplement that is "not a performance-enhancing steroid," but after using the gel for a month, Canseco discovers his natural testosterone levels are still well below normal.
"My body forgot how to make testosterone," says Canseco, which may explain his recent trip to Mexico. According to anti-doping expert Dr. Gary Wadler, HCG is used by males who have abused steroids and want to help stimulate testosterone and sperm production. It is a Schedule III controlled substance in California and is not available in the U.S. without a prescription. Canseco did not have a prescription when he was stopped by border patrol agents.